Managing vs. Experiencing Grief
Grief often arrives unexpectedly, triggered by a song, a scent, or a memory that suddenly transports us back to our loss. During these moments, our bodies respond physically—perhaps with a tightening chest, a lump in the throat, or tears that seem to come from nowhere. Rather than immediately trying to “manage” these feelings away, there’s profound healing in allowing yourself to experience grief fully.
Next time you feel grief rising, try this:
- Pause and ask yourself, “Where do I feel the grief go in my body?”
- Notice without judgment where tension, heaviness, or pain manifests. This awareness is the first step toward genuine healing.
- Complement this practice with daily mindfulness for 10-15 minutes, creating a quiet space to acknowledge your feelings without being overwhelmed by them.
Remember, grief isn’t something to “get over”—it’s something to move through with compassion for yourself and the love that created your loss in the first place.
Books and Resources
Video: “Good grief! What I Learned from Loss” by Elaine Mansfield
Book: “You’re Not Crazy: You’re Grieving” by Alan D. Wolfelt
Article: “Coping with Grief and Loss: Stages of Grief, the Grieving Process, and Learning to Heal” by Melinda Smith, M.A., Lawrence Robinson and Jeanne Segal, Ph.D.
Article: “After You’ve Experienced A Serious Loss – Using Rituals in Your Grief Journey” by Kelsey Collett, LCSW
Article: “Grief Rituals: Definition, Examples, & Ideas to Try” by Adam Koenig, MA, RP, CCC, CT
Article: “7 Grief Rituals That Get Us Through a Loss“
Inspiration
“When one person is missing the whole world seems empty.” Pat Schweibert
“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.” Jamie Anderson
“There is no “normal” way to grieve. Except for how we each do it.” Melvina Young
“The Moon and I” by Donna Ashworth, from Wild Hope
